---- 10 Fictional Deaths I Will Never Get Over ----

One of the worst things about reading is becoming emotionally attached to characters, following them through page after page of their journey, and then seeing them killed off. I've always found deaths in books are so much more emotional than in movies - you are literally inside the characters head, feeling what they're feeling, seeing what they're seeing - so whenever my much-loved characters die, it's safe to say I become emotionally unstable. 

Some fictional deaths have touched me in such a way that years later I still feel that pang of hurt every time I remember. But I'm not saying I don't agree with killing off characters - it certainly makes the book stay with you long after you put it down, and so I compiled a list of all the fictional deaths I am still recovering from.

Spoilers. Obviously. So if you haven't read these books, don't read this list!

. The Mortal Instruments series

. Harry Potter series

. The Hunger Games trilogy

. The Divergent trilogy

. The Book Thief

. The Fault in our Stars

. A Game of Thrones

If you have read the above, then carry on!.....

10. Max Lightwood (City of Glass)

Max was such a sweet, innocent, intelligent boy. His death was cruel and cold (screw you, Sebastian) and I think he'd be higher on the list if we had actually experienced his death - we aren't 'there' when he dies, we just see through Clary's eyes as the Lightwoods mourn over his body. It still made me well up though - I loved Max!

9. Dumbledore (Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince)

This one doesn't need much explaining. It'd be higher on my list if it weren't for the fact that Dumbledore had lived a long, full life before his time came, and he chose his ending for himself. Still, though, it was hard to deal with, and the reactions of the characters (particularly Harry) are what really made me emotional.

8. Primrose Everdeen (The Hunger Games)

Prim's whole journey was very emotional for me. She was forced to go through things that no twelve year old should go through, yet stayed sweet and honest right to the end, putting her faith in others despite being in a world when your life depends on trusting nobody. She was strong and brave in ways that most aren't, saw the world in a beautiful way, and was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.

7. Ned Stark (A Game of Thrones)

I was not expecting Ned to die. Throughout the book he'd been that 'hero' character; I was sure he'd defeat the Lannister control and take the throne as a noble and respected king... but hey, that would be too boring, right? So dickface Joffrey had him beheaded! I was surprised in the worst way possible. Worse still was seeing it through Arya, and feeling so utterly helpless as he's killed. Poor Ned only ever wanted his family to be happy, and he payed for that with his life.

6. Fred Weasley (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)

The thing that shakes me so much about Fred's death is how quick it was. By that I mean that there was no buildup, no foreshadowing, it just happened. Sure, they went into battle knowing they could die, but I don't think any of them really considered it would happen. The thought of George and the rest of the Weasley's living without him is a hard one to picture. Deaths in battles are always shocking, because they feel so pointless - especially when it happens to people like Fred who were never really meant for war. He was meant for a family, for smiling and for happiness, which he will never be able to get.

5. Finnick Odair (Mockingjay)

The worst part about Finnick's death was that it was so unnecessary. I will always believe that the book would been much better if he had lived - if he had been happy with Annie for the rest of his life, and got to meet and see his son grow up. I think Annie needed him - she is emotionally unstable after all, so how could she look after their son all alone? I can never find suitable justification for his death, and combined with Prim's death makes the ending of the series very bleak for me, but at least he died helping his friends.

4. Dobby (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)

It may be controversial to put Dobby's death higher on the list than Fred and Dumbledore's, but I'll be 100% honest and say Dobby's death affected me the most. The beach setting, his heartbreaking last words, his act of sacrifice for Harry (Dumbledore's was a sacrifice too, but we didn't know that until later - Dobby literally jumped into a knife for him) Everything about his death was so beautifully tragic and true to his character. Who knew it was possible to be so attached to a house elf.

3. Augustus Waters (The Fault in our Stars)

The Fault in Our Stars portrays a strong message. Cancer takes no notice of your age, your dreams or your beautiful personality. You can believe that you can beat it, you can think that you are getting better, but there are things beyond our control and don't always go the way we planned. But that doesn't mean they aren't beautiful; this book is more or less a tragedy, but it is still beautiful. Augustus makes Hazel grow and change, he changes things in the world before he dies, and proves that just because you're dying doesn't mean you have to stop living.

2. Rudy Steiner (The Book Thief)

I cried like a baby when Rudy died. And many times before that. Because the thing with the Book Thief is that you're told who will die and when, by Death himself (and he sure he knows his sh*t) When you know a character will die, it makes every moment with them so much more special; you notice the light and the goodness in them so much more, and with Rudy it is endless. The kiss he never got will forever make me tear up - rest in peace, the boy with hair the colour of lemons.

1. Tris Prior (Allegiant)

Never in my life have I been so distraught by a fictional death. When I first finished Allegiant I was in complete disbelief - I had never read a book where the heroine died before and I was so completely unprepared - I'd been expecting a 'happy family' epilogue. Nope, that didn't happen! I sobbed for hours and actually grieved for Tris for a few days, moaning about how unfair it was! It's awful to imagine Tobias living without her, but reflecting back I can see that death for Tris was her 'ultimate sacrifice'; she would've never be able to live her life truly happy in the shadow of all that had happened.

It was unexpected, tragic, selfless, brave, and downright beautiful. 

So there you have it, my list of ten fictional deaths that still get to me every time I think of them. It damaged me emotionally to reminisce about them all at once, I think I need some serious comfort food now. Sob.

Hope you enjoyed it,

- emssily

---- Prettiest Book Covers ----

These aren't necessarily books that I own, but are books with a cover that completely convinces me to want to read it. 

I'm also not saying the book itself is any good - there are a number on this list that in my opinion aren't very good; but the cover work is beautiful. Like a really attractive guy with nothing going on inside his head. Anyway, here they are...

1. The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer by Michelle Hodkin
2. Hush, Hush by Becca Fitzpatrick
3. The Assassin's Blade by Sarah J. Maas

1. The Selection by Keira Cass
2. Shatter Me by Tahereh Mafi
3. The Mark of Athena by Rick Riordan

1. Across The Universe by Beth Revis
2. Fallen by Lauren Kate
3. Matched by Ally Condie

 Do you agree?
- emssily

---- Book Review: Unravel Me (Tahereh Mafi) ----

Author: Tahereh Mafi
Genre: YA, Dystopian, Romance
Publisher: Harper Collins
Page count: 461
Synopsis: 
tick, tick, tick, tick, tick
it's almost
time for war.
Juliette has escaped to Omega Point. It is a place for people like her—people with gifts—and it is also the headquarters of the rebel resistance. 

She's finally free from The Reestablishment, free from their plan to use her as a weapon, and free to love Adam. But Juliette will never be free from her lethal touch. 
Or from Warner, who wants Juliette more than she ever thought possible.

In this exhilarating sequel to Shatter Me, Juliette has to make life-changing decisions between what she wants and what she thinks is right. Decisions that might involve choosing between her heart—and Adam's life.

Overview (No Spoilers)

To sum up, I loved Unravel Me.

I'll start off by recapping my feelings about the first book in the series - Shatter Me, which was just about a four star book for me. I thought it was enjoyable, captivating and found myself relating to the characters and their situations (not that people die when I touch them, I just thought they were written very realistically)

However, my main issue with Shatter Me was the writing. At times it was deep and meaningful, other times it came across as a babble of shit nonsense. I think perhaps Tahereh tried to be just a bit too deep, to the point where the words didn't really make any sense. And she got a lot of backlash about it. Exhibit A:

“All I ever wanted was to reach out and touch another human being not just with my hands but with my heart.”

 ...beautiful quote!

"His eyes are two buckets of rainwater"

...erm, wut?!

I believe that she took the negativity into account when writing Unravel Me. The writing is so much better in this book; it was touching, at times emotional and provided quotes that were relatable and perceptive, whilst also giving me a unique perspective on the world Juliette lives in. There were still times when I felt like rolling my eyes and skipping a few paragraphs, but to a much lesser extent than in Shatter Me.

Contrary to popular opinion, I actually really loved Juliette in the first book - she was surprisingly sassy (which always entertains me) and taking her past into consideration, she's a pretty damn strong chick. For the most part I continued to like Juliette throughout Unravel me, although at times she was annoyingly over emotional. 

Then there's the other characters. By the end of the first chapter book, my love for Adam had pretty much disappeared. It's not that he's a bad guy, there's just a lot that happens around Juliette that makes me firmly believe he shouldn't be her future. That maybe someone else needs her more. Cough *Warner*. 

The newer characters were a good addition to the story - I particularly liked the healing sisters and Kenji.

Overall I'd say Shatter Me pales in comparison to this book. It was full of romance (steamy, at times!) action and suspense, along with a few plot twists that I never expected and moments that had me physically gasping. Yes, it's a little bit more focused on love rather than action, but hey, it's a great read nonetheless and I couldn't put it down even if I tried.

(4.5 stars)

Discussion (Spoilers!!!)

(Warner in my fangirl head... mmm)

Okay I'll admit it, I'M TEAM WARNER. I fell in love with him during this book (and also in the 'Destroy Me' novella - highly recommend!)

That moment in her room was way more explicit that I'd expected, and I'm okay with that - usually YA writers are afraid to mention words like 'inner thigh' and 'underwear' but Tahereh Mafi went there. Good on you, girl! 

It's undeniable that Warner and me Juliette have serious sexual chemistry, so I say they should just follow their instincts and GET TOGETHER. It's clear Warner wanted to, but Juliette needs to stop trailing after Adam like a lost puppy and be with the guy who is better for her.

And now we know that Juliette is physically weakening Adam by touching him! Warner on the other hand literally gains strength from it. It's a clear sign from the Universe that they are meant to have babies be together. She relies on Adam far too much and it drags them both down.

All the crying and screaming from Juliette was just irritating, and I kept getting these weird mental images of her hyperventilating on the floor. Yes, her inner dialogue improved and she wasn't as whiny, but she 'fell to the floor, screaming' at least three times in this book. Man up, Juliette. You can kill anyone if you want to, just own it.

Warner and Adam are brothers!? Biggest WTF moment in the book - but it makes so much sense. I thought it was a bit 'convenient' that they could both touch her but it makes a lot more sense considering they share the same DNA. James's power was brought up and forgotten pretty abruptly but I'm sure it'll be significant in the next book.

I hate to say it, but James is an awful example of a 10 year old. I have a ten year old brother and he certainly doesn't act anything like how James does. Yes, I get that he would've had a traumatizing childhood, but surely that would only make him stronger, make him more aware of the situations around him and how he should behave. 

At times he speaks like a six year old, other times a teenager - I just didn't sense much consistency with his character.

This quote for example:

"He blinked several times before pushing through the crowd to clamber onto Kenji's bed. Burrowed into his side and promptly fell sleep."

Wait, so, he's a dog now? Or a baby?

What ten year old acts that way?

Think of it this way - when the Harry Potter books started Harry was eleven. Can you imagine him acting that way? No, Harry fights monsters and saves lives and acts like an intelligent, brave young adult. 

James's however speaks and acts like there's nothing going on inside that brain of his, and it annoys the hell out of me. 

Not to end on a negative note, the last thing I'll say is that the confrontations with Anderson were epic. The first time, she shoots him (my inner thoughts were something like that: YES JULIETTE, SHOOT HIM IN THE HEAD THE EVIL-)

The second time, he shoots her! In the chest!

I knew she wasn't going to die but it was still a massive shock. I like that Warner helped save her life and that he saw her 'dying', because hopefully it'll make him realize how valuable Juliette is to him and he'll do anything now to keep her safe.

I hope Brendan and Winston are found safely, I hope they find Anderson and put a bullet through his head, and most of all I hope Juliette realizes how goddamn perfect she is with Warner.

Jularner? Warniette? Why, Tahereh, must you provide such unshippable names?

That'll be all :)

- emssily 

---- Book Bloggers Memory Tag ----

1. Kensuke's Kingdom by Michael Morpurgo (childhood favourite!)
2. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson (tattoo form counts, right?)
3. Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck (whipping out the literature)
4. The Vampire Diaries by L.J.Smith (great TV show too)
5. I Am The Messenger by Marcuz Zusak (I'm not 100% sure on this one)
6. Nope, can't do this one!
7. A Game of Thrones by George R.R.Martin (swords are technically just big knives)
8. The One by Kiera Cass (never read it but still)
9. The Darren Shan Saga by Darren Shan (had to google 'eponymous', I won't lie)
10. The Maze Runner by James Dashner (so excited to see it)
Thanks for reading!
I tag whoever is reading this sentence right now.- emssily 

(This tag was inspired by Devin-Reads-Books)

---- BOOK HAUL ----

April Book Hoarding has happened... and I'm not sorry about it.

. Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare

I bought this at my local bookstore on a whim, because I miss the Mortal Instruments series and I think it's about time I met Will Herondale. This makes me very excited.

. The Evolution of Mara Dyer by Michelle Hodkin

I've had the first book for weeks now  and I've made no attempt to read it, but now that I have both I'll marathon them sometime. Beautiful covers.

. Unite Me by Tahereh Mafi

A bind up of the two Shatter Me novellas. I don't usually buy novellas but I heard this was crucial to understanding the next book, and after reading it I can agree. Do recommend!

. Unravel Me by Tahereh Mafi

The second book in the Shatter Me series - a series that I've decided I love. I'm 3/4 through the book already and itching to by 
the next one.  And just look at that cover - so pretty! *ahh*

. Ruby Red by Kristin Gier

I haven't read much about time travelling teenage girls before but I'm excited that now I can. A lot thinner than I expected - I think this will be perfect for when I want a quick read.

. Never Fade by Alexandra Bracken 

I waited so long for this! I've already read it and loved it, not as much as The Darkest Minds but still - Alexandra Bracken you are a writing genius. Oh, the feels.

And that's all the books I've bought this month, and it's only halfway through. Damn you beautiful covers, making me buy you all the time.

P.S. Lets just take a moment to appreciate another amazing thing about 'Unravel Me'... DECKLED EDGES.

<<<<<

Only a true booklover understands the brilliance of deckled edges. Thank you, publisher.

you beauty, you!

That'll be all :) 

- emssily x

---- 5 books I just HAD to buy... but still haven't read ----

'We all have them.  That book that you needed to buy so badly and had every intention of reading it as soon as possible...but they're still on your bookshelf collecting dust or sitting in a pile on the floor.'

These are some of mine:

1. The Night Circus (by Erin Morgenstern)

"The circus arrives without warning. No announcements precede it. It is simply there, when yesterday it was not. The black sign, painted in white letters that hangs upon the gates, reads:

Opens at Nightfall

Closes at Dawn

As the sun disappears beyond the horizon, all over the tents small lights begin to flicker, as though the entirety of the circus is covered in particularly bright fireflies. When the tents are all aglow, sparkling against the night sky, the sign appears.

Le Cirque des Rêves

The Circus of Dreams.

Now the circus is open.

Now you may enter."

The Night Circus is possibly one of the prettiest books on my shelf - I absolutely love black and white covers and this one is undeniably gorgeous. I bought it a few months ago largely because of its cover, and due to the constant raving about it in the booktube community, but I just never got around to it. Shame on me.

2. Ready Player One (by Ernest Cline)

"In the year 2044, reality is an ugly place. The only time teenager Wade Watts really feels alive is when he's jacked into the virtual Utopia known as the OASIS. Wade's devoted his life to studying the puzzles hidden within this digital world's confines - puzzles that are based on their creator's obsession with the pop culture of decades past and puzzles that promise massive power and fortune to whoever can unlock them.

But when Wade stumbles upon the first clue, he finds himself beset by players willing to kill to take this ultimate prize. 

The race is on, and if Wade's going to survive, he'll have to win - and confront the real world he's always been so desperate to escape." 

This book seems so unique and interesting, yet in the two months I've owned it I have made no attempts to read it. It's so different from my usual picks, but I bought it anyway thanks to the numerous good reviews I'd heard and the oh-so-intriguing summary. I will get around to it, I swear.

3. Cinder (by Marissa Meyer)

"A forbidden romance.

A deadly plague.

Earth's fate hinges on one girl . . .

CINDER, a gifted mechanic in New Beijing, is also a cyborg. She's reviled by her stepmother and blamed for her stepsister's sudden illness. But when her life becomes entwined with the handsome Prince Kai's, she finds herself at the center of a violent struggle between the desires of an evil queen - and a dangerous temptation.

Cinder is caught between duty and freedom, loyalty and betrayal. Now she must uncover secrets about her mysterious past in order to protect Earth's future.

This is not the fairytale you remember. But it's one you won't forget."

I have heard SO many good things about this book, as well as Marissa Meyer and this series in general. All I know is what's on the blurb - that it's based on the fairy tale 'Cinderella', but with a modern twist - she's a cyborg. I believe there are three books currently in the series, and all the stories are based on other fairy tales with some 'overlapping character' business. I know I have to get on this series, but I keep putting it off and I'm not sure why. Hmmf. 

4.  Silence of the Lambs (by Thomas Harris)

"An FBI trainee.

A psychopath locked up for unspeakable crimes.

And a serial killer getting ever closer to his latest victim ...

FBI rookie Clarice Starling turns to Dr. Hannibal Lecter, monster cannibal held in a hospital for the criminally insane, for insight into the deadly madman she must find. As Dr. Lecter invites her into the darkest chambers of his mind, he forces her to confront her own childhood demons as the price of understanding, an unspeakable tuition he exacts to teach her how the monster thinks. And time is running out . . ."

I saw this book at a book sale months ago, and was so shocked; The Silence of the Lambs is one of my favourite films of all time, and I had no idea it was a book. It's multiple books in fact - and I picked up all of them. How many have I read? None. I do want to read it, I do, but I have to admit I bought it mainly to look at and appreciate. I don't know if I'll ever get round to it, but I can say I HIGHLY recommend the films to anyone who hasn't seen them, and I'm sure the book is great too if you're a freak like me who's into serial killers and great plot lines!

5. Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children (by Ransom Riggs) 

"A mysterious island. An abandoned orphanage. And a strange collection of very curious photographs. 

A horrific family tragedy sets 16 year-old Jacob journeying to a remote island off the coast of Wales, where he discovers the crumbling ruins of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children. As Jacob explores its abandoned bedrooms and hallways, it becomes clear that the children who once lived here-one of whom was his own grandfather-were more than just peculiar. They may have been dangerous. They may have been quarantined on a desolate island for good reason. And somehow - impossible though it seems - they may still be alive. A spine-tingling fantasy illustrated with haunting vintage photography that will delight adults, teens, and anyone who relishes an adventure in the shadows."

Just flicking through the pages of this book is quite an experience - it's full of very old and very real photographs the author collected himself, taken in Victorian times featuring creepy places and people. He wrote a novel around those photographs, and it sounds so interesting that I bought both this book and its sequel as soon as I heard about them. However, they've both been sitting on my shelf for a while now... Oops. I will definitely find the time to marathon both of them in the future though, as I've heard amazing things about them and can't wait to read a book that combines my love for reading and my love for horror.

And that's all :) When/If I finish any of these books, I may have to make a victory post with reviews, so look out for that!

This post was inspired by a weekly meme over at The Broke and the Bookish. If you're not already, I recommend following/reading their blog :)

Thanks for reading!

- emssily 

--- The Mortal Instruments: City of Heavenly Fire predictions! ---

  As any Mortal Instruments fan will know, the sixth (and final) book in the series is set for release on the 27th May this year. That's only a month away!

   

So what will happen in this book?

Well straight away we know that the Sebastian dilemma has to be solved. He's walking around ripping wings off angels - that boy needs to go. Question is, will Cassandra Clare kill him off, or will she go down the 'Sebastian can be redeemed' route?

I know I'd rather see him dead! Yeah yeah, a lot of people actually like Sebastian but c'mon people, he's a murderer, rapist and complete psychopath. I do have a feeling that Cassandra might find a way for him to 'become good' again. Hmm, maybe they'll suck the demon blood out of him?

Hopefully it's a very painful process...

And then there's Magnus and Alec *sob*. MALEC NEEDS TO HAPPEN AGAIN. If it doesn't, my fangirl heart will break.

Although, I do have a feeling that one of the two will die. Or perhaps both. Which brings me to my next point.

Six people will die!

Why Cass, why!? 'Six characters we know by name die in CoHF', quoted from the woman herself. Now, many people predict that this means six main characters will die, forgetting the fact that there's many characters in the book who are very minor, but we still 'know them  by name', so they would still count as one of the six. 

My predictions on the 6 deaths are:

1. Magnus or Alec (or both). I love Malec and I hope for everyone's sake that I'm wrong, but I feel like a death is on the horizon. Let's face it, they will always have problems - Magnus will inevitably live longer than Alec, Alec will always struggle to accept Magnus's past. There doesn't seem to be a 'happy ending' for them, so I think it's likely one of them will die.

I'm leaning more towards the probability of it being Magnus. If Alec dies, Magnus would have to live for eternity alone, and a hole would be left in the Lightwood family that would affect all other characters. I don't think Cass would end the book that way. Although despite that, Alec seems to feel so guilty for what he did to Magnus that it wouldn't surprise me if he died saving Magnus as a 'final apology' type situation. So I can't decide which is more likely. Sigh. I JUST WANT MALEC TO LOVE EACH OTHER.

2. Sebastian. DIE SEBASTIAN DIE! 'nuff said.

3+4. Jordan and Maia. I feel with these two that if one goes down, they both go down. Neither of them really have anywhere to go, or much to live for (harsh, I'm sorry).. so it wouldn't surprise me if they died. As evil as I feel saying it, I'd rather those two died than any of the others. SUE ME.

5. A vampire. Excluding Simon! We have the situation going on with Raphael, Maureen, and Camille - yes I know Camille has been pronounced dead but c'mon, I'll believe it when I see it. Well, read it... She's one of the most powerful vampires alive, would she really be killed so easily by a little girl? Either way, I feel that one of the deaths will happen between them.

6. Robert Lightwood. IMO, Robert hasn't been the best father throughout the books - or the best husband. I feel like he'll realise this and die saving his family to prove to them he did love them, or some soppy situation like that. That makes sense, as Cass said on Twitter that someone will die 'saving another character'.

The fate of the others;

I don't feel like any of the Lightwood children will die (counting Jace). They all need each other so much, it doesn't feel right to me that any of them would die. It would ruin their lives so much that the book could never end in a positive way. 

Jace and Clary I'm 99% sure will be fine. There's still that 1% of me that's terrified Cassandra will pull a Veronica on us (Allegiant readers, you know my feels) but I doubt it. I think Jace will get all his annoying fire sucked out somehow, the two will finally DO IT and bam, happy ending. Yay!

Simon and Isabelle. God I love these two. I love them even more than Jace and Clary. They are so perfect together and have been through so much, they deserve a happy ending together and Cass will give it to us, so I don't think they'll die. Yes, Cass did leak the chapter title 'Simon's Sacrifice' and people are freaking out about it, but would she really make it that obvious? If she was going to kill off the most loved character, I'm sure she'd try to keep it more of a secret. So, SIMON SHALL LIVE. 

So many people are afraid of him dying, but I just don't see it happening. Isabelle would be devasted, Clary would be in pieces, plagued with guilt her whole life and therefore so would Jace. Cass said herself the book would end in 'closure' for all characters. If Simon died I don't imagine there'd ever be closure. So high five everyone, Simon is reasonably safe! (please don't die Simon). He's too lucky to die, and Isabelle is too badass to get killed. There is the problem of Simon's immortality, but maybe he'll turn Isabelle into a vampire; now that would be epic. 

Luke and Jocelyn will be fine, I'm sure. Hopefully they'll actually get married in this book - that would be a really cute ending IMO. They've waited forever for each other, I really doubt Cass would tear them apart now. Honestly they don't interest me that much, as I don't really like Jocelyn (sorry, Jocelyn!)

I'll stop writing now, because I feel like I could ramble on about fictional lives for way too long, and the thought of any of my MI babies dying is just too hard.

After City of Heavenly Fire is released, I hope this post wont be embarrassingly off the mark, although it probably will. Sigh. 

- Emssily